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Posted by / 13-Apr-2020 20:53

Being friends first then dating

I wanted to see him more, but I did not want to get attached before we would en dup being two hours away from each other.

College started, and our talking stopped until one night I decided to start things back up with him. We have had our struggles here and there because of the distance, but not once have we decided that we are not meant for each other.

The boys I dated in high school all ended up leading to short relationships because I did not build a friendship before becoming committed to them.

I think this is one of the biggest mistakes females make in our society. We don’t even think about building that sense of trust and friendship before actually dating because we are too strung up on the idea of “needing” a boy in our life.

However, I became a manager of our girl’s soccer team in high school, and he also did shortly after. We both easily could tell we liked each other, but we wanted it to take its own course. I was able to see his fun and corky side, which got me to like him more and more as a person.

I felt comfortable around him and I wanted to get to know him on a deeper level.

If people read our texts, they would just assume we were friends. We don’t have the sappy, lovey-dovey texts that everyone would assume would be in a conversation between a boyfriend and girlfriend.

I've never been "friends first" with a boy, though the concept is quite fascinating. Many experts advise that couples should be friends first.

Imagine you meet someone that you're not attracted to. Then the relationship is based on personal compatibility, not just sexual chemistry. Grace Cornish avers that romances that begin as friendships are more likely to succeed: "You're always kind to your friend. There's no respect if you become possessive and controlling." "If you have a genuine friendship, you're not going to pretend to be someone you're not so a person can marry you.

Then later, as some times goes by, suddenly, you begin to notice all these fantastic qualities about them that you didn't know existed, and boom! You're looking for your friend to get ahead by looking out for his best interest. Some people are on their best behavior until they cross the threshold. But your true nature will surface when you're a person's friend first.

Of course I had my cute little relationships in middle school where I thought I was in love, but really, I had no idea what love even was or why I was in the relationship in the first place.

This is all because I was pressed to believe that just simply being in a relationship made everything better.

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