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This would include how to share about yourself/ your single, how quickly you would call back after doing your ‘research’, after the dates, etc.While the word on the street is that you must get back to the shadchan with 3 days of hearing of a shiduch suggestion, for some that simply isn’t possible. “I will get back to you in 8 days.” You might share your reasoning, but you really don’t have to.All marriages have a certain amount of ups and downs.No matter how healthy the spouses were when they got married.I will let you know by the next morning.” If your single needs time to reflect, you can let the shadchan know that there will be a slight delay.“My single needs some more time to think things through.You can discover a latent health condition after you get married. And then become educated about this particular health concern and the way s/he is dealing with it.We can’t possibly predict what will come down the road, but the things that usually never change are the middos, level of kindness and compassion, and intelligence. You might speak with your own physician, a Rofeh Yedid; however, some general practitioners do not know much about how some of the more nuanced conditions impact the patient.
It’s about how you deal with whatever life (Hashem) dishes out to you. However, it is only one of many important issues married couples have to deal with.
It really depends on the individual and the specific issues. Relationships in general are really about weighing what you can live with and what’s a deal breaker. There will be triggers that will make it worse or better as you experience life’s ups and downs; are you prepared to deal with the lows? As far as the other person: It depends on the specific condition and level of severity and frequency.
That said, getting back to your question about dating someone with mental disorder. Probably the most important thing to consider is whether s/he admits that s/he has this condition and is committed to sticking to a path of treatment and can manage the condition well with medications, diet, therapy and the like. (Some people with mental illnesses are in denial or refuse to persist with treatment.
from: Crohns Colitis Coalition (CCC) Chaim Medical Resource 845-492-8700 #2 [email protected] Society (cystic fibrosis) 718-866-9000 for Rare Jewish Genetic Disorders Chaim Jalas – Division of Bonei Olam 718-301-9774 [email protected] to get back to the shadchan?
Perhaps, the most important part of the discussion with the shadchan is about how you will work together on the shiduch.
They take a pill in the morning, maybe another at night. Indeed, some conditions might be hereditary, many are not. At the same time, some personality traits are difficult to live with and those seem to be passed down through the generations. If you can laugh together as you work through the hard times … If you can help each other accomplish dreams and goals…. Even if you do spend more time at the doctor than others. Just because someone is diagnosed with a mental disorder does not mean they can’t be in a normal, happy and very functional relationship.